Hey, Asshat! You Left The Pickle Jar Open.

Again. This time it was especially fun because it was one of those ginormous jars from Costco. No doubt it was a good deal, but that's a lot of pickles (and pickle juice). Let me tell you, there is nothing better than having pickles and pickle juice come flying out of the refrigerator when you are trying to put away the leftovers from dinner. Thankfully, I can't stand the smell of pickles (due to your obsession with pickles and your bad habit of leaving pickle jars slightly open so the smell is ever-present in the refrigerator) because the whole house smells like a big fucking pickle now. I was also thankful to discover that the stove is downhill from the refrigerator because the pickle juice ran underneath it like its life depended on it. I left it to you to take care of that part of the mess. Hopefully you do a better job of cleaning that up than you did closing the pickle jar.

tags: I'm In Bit of a Pickle House