Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Here is the important thing: this man is willingly taking on today what has got to be the shittiest job in the world. Normally, one could view being POTUS as the top prize of jobs, but after eight years of destructive policy that just isn't true any more. So this is what I have to say to you, Barack Obama: thank you and good luck. Because you are going to need it.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
I'd like to start by saying that I easily could have done a list far longer than the top ten stupidest moments of Baby Boy Bush. Let's face it after living under his thumb since 1995, the list could have been a lot longer. Frankly, being governor of Texas and undoing every good thing Ann Richards ever did for Texas was just practice for undoing the good work our Founding Fathers did. And over the course of this blog I have bashed and ridiculed this asshole for a lot of the things he has done so there is not need to go back and rehash it all. Besides it just pisses me off to think on it too much. One can only hope that at this point, he will go back to his "ranch" in Crawford (and Laura back to Big D as I have heard from a very reliable source) and we will never hear from them again. And in honor of all the foolishness I leave you with this: the segwey accident.
This may not have been the most spectacularly stupid thing he ever did as leader of the free world, but definitely one of the most foolish. He fell off of his mother's segway. Just think about this for a minute. If Barbara Bush can ride that thing without injury, shouldn't he be able to? So goodbye, you clumsy mother fucker and thanks for destroying the economy, the constitution, and our relationships with the rest of the world. You will not be missed.
Friday, January 09, 2009
"I'm optimistic by nature. And I'm going to take this experience and things that I've learned and hopefully be a productive member of our community," he said. "I'm very wide open. I've had some people say I'm very fortunate that I'm at a point in my life where if I wanted to do something completely different — be baseball commissioner, for example, I would love a job in baseball, a plug there — I can do it."
I guess this means that when I completely destroy the Constitution and the reputation of this nation, I will be thinking the next logical step in my career will be taking a job as baseball commissioner. That about sums it up.
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Here, Baby Boy Bush claims that not only is this an old Tennessee saying (this, I cannot verify one way or another) but it is also an old saying in Texas. Unless this is something they say while they are turkey bowling, I vehemently dispute that stupid remark. This was the first time I had ever heard this "old saying." Thankfully, it was not the last because it is really funny.
Monday, January 05, 2009
**If you don't live in Texas, you probably don't give a shit about any of this and that is OK.
Hey! I'm the Asshat they call president! Heh heh heh. See! I can flip you off because I'm the president! Heh heh heh.
Baby Boy Bush making his Mama proud!
Friday, January 02, 2009
Some asshat once told me that it is good luck when a bird shits on you (a sentiment echoed by this reporter). Obviously, the people that say things like that have never experienced it. I did not feel lucky my freshman year in college when a bird shit on my head while I was flirting with a cute boy. However in the case of this clip, the world at large at least got a chuckle.