Thursday, March 19, 2009

The Upside Down Pineapple

I can't believe I'm doing this. It may be the fact that I haven't really slept in a few days, but I think that I'd still be going to bat for Meghan McCain even if I were well rested. You heard me: Meghan McCain. Truthfully, she can stick up for herself.

But here is my thing, Laura Ingraham really crossed a line when she called Ms. McCain fat. This all started with a fight that Ms. McCain picked with Ann Coulter. As Ms. McCain correctly points out Ann Coulter is too extreme and really doesn't represent mainstream Republican thinking. She could have also pointed out that Ann Coulter is a hate monger and that she could snap her like the insignificant twig that she is, but she didn't. It seems that Ms. McCain recognizes that there is a big problem within the GOP and wants to work to solve it. She also recognizes that the world has changed and that people just aren't buying into that extremist, hateful crap that people like Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter are spewing. Honestly, Ms. McCain's cause is not mine because I really don't care that the GOP is in shambles and has been hijacked by a few extreme nut jobs. But more power to her, just the same.

The odd thing about all of this is that Ann Coulter hasn't opened her annoying trap in response. Not one peep (we know her silence does not signal her agreement with Ms. McCain's assessment). Could she be too busy morning the decline in her book sales to pipe up and say something completely offensive and out of line about Ms. McCain? I can't imagine that she asked Laura Ingraham for her help because she is unable to make her own offensive remarks in response. But that's how it worked out. Laura Ingraham decided she should respond to Ms. McCain's criticisms of Ann Coulter. I'm not really sure what a "useful idiot" is because how could an idiot ever be useful? But calling her a plus-sized model? Well, that bitch has gone too far. Where is the logic in that? I don't like what you said so you must be fat?!? Now, that is some "useful" dialogue. No wonder, not even Fox News wants Laura Ingraham. Besides, Meghan McCain is not fat. Frankly, the GOP should keep its collective mouth shut until it has something constructive to say. At this point, only Meghan McCain should be doing the talking because the rest of them aren't working to solve the problem they are just adding to it.

And just for the record, both Ann Coulter and Laura Ingraham can kiss my fat ass.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Too Bad You Can't Keep Up

Certain whiners, like Senator "Campaign Suspender" McCain and Senator Arlen Spector, believe that President Obama should only focus on the economy to the exclusion of all else. While the economy is in the tank, there are a lot of other issues that are important (health care, education, energy, etc.). And guess what? Fix those things and you repair the economy in the long term (the stimulus package is merely a stop gap measure). Then there are certain other fat asses that just hope that he fails. Under the old administration, that would have been considered "un-American" and out right treason. Now that we have the right to free speech (and other civil liberties) again that is just considered stupid and idiotic.

Thankfully, our President can fix more than one thing at a time (he really can walk and chew gum at the same time!). It isn't my problem that those Republicans are too slow and can't keep up. The American voters picked Obama because he is like Elvis (if you are slow Republican, this means Obama can TCB in a flash (TCB means to "take care of business")). Unlike that old guy that pretended to suspend his campaign in an attempt to get out of a debate he knew he would lose to go campaign instead of showing up in D.C. to "solve the economic crisis" at a time the fundamentals of the economy were strong.

So, it turns out that this is not going to be the "No Drama Obama" administration people were predicting. It just happens that all the drama is created by a bunch of babies that hate that Obama is faster, stronger and smarter than them. Maybe we should call it As the Republican Party Self-Destructs?

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Want A Free Meal? Call 911

You may run into some trouble with the local police and may have to visit a judge for misusing 911, but in the end you will get some free McNuggets. Just ask Latreasa Goodman of Florida. She called 911 three times when her local McDonald's ran out of Chicken McNuggets and refused to give her a refund. The end result was that McCDonald's will be giving her a full refund and a free meal. I guess calling 911 paid (off unless you factor in that trip to the courthouse to deal with the criminal charge for misusing 911). I guess those McNuggets must be really good.

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Is this what it has come to?

Since we can't find anything really wrong with Michelle Obama people are bitching about her sleeveless dresses? I guess they got all the mileage they could out of her quitting her job to help her husband become president. When the media couldn't paint her as some pushover, they had nowhere to go. Until they realized she likes to wear sleeveless dresses. I know things are a little boring when there aren't criminals running things, but since when did the right to bare arms become a news story? The answer is: this week.

Frankly, after the last eight years of Laura "Crazy-Eyes" Bush and her boring ass wardrobe, seeing a fashionable First Lady is nice. And I'm at a loss as to why there is such an ado about her wearing a sleeveless dress to the President's Congressional Address. Just because everyone else has worn boring ass suits and dumpy dresses to those things in the past doesn't mean you can't wear something nice. I thought you were supposed to wear something nice when you were going to be on TV. And if I had guns like that, I'd wear sleeveless dresses and shirts everyday.

I'm guessing the new fashion is going to be women with some serious guns going sleeveless. I've already seen lots of nice flower pins in the stores (a la Democratic Convention). I already had the vintage jewelry, but I guess it is time to go to the gym to work on my own set of guns.