Tuesday, February 20, 2007

take that!

“You may all go to Hell, and I will go to Texas”
--Davy Crockett

Our idiot of a governor tried to fast track 6 coal-fired plants in central Texas by executive order. I don't know about my neighbors, but I'm not interested in breathing that crap. The good news (for now) is that a state judge issued an injunction today. Seems like Pretty Boy Perry has gotten a little big for his britches lately issuing all sorts of executive orders and mandates. Who does he think he is, god? Farming out the Trans-Texas Corridor to some out of state company (the voters never approved it), unfunded vaccines, and now he wants to pollute my air? What's next? Is he going to mandate what time I can take a shit? That jackass didn't even get a majority of the votes. I think it is pretty clear that most of us don't even like him. So here is my message to you: FUCK OFF!

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Casual Rain

That's right, I said casual rain. On Friday I was in the car and they were talking about the weather. They said it was overcast with casual rain. Did it dress down because it was casual Friday?

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Here is my conspiracy theory

Well, I'm not really sure what "They" are conspiring to do yet, but it will become clear in time. Of course, the "They" is also unclear. But there isn't a conspiracy unless you have a list of dead people with a connection.

Here is a list of deaths:

1. J. Howard Marshall died on August 4, 1995 (left Anna Nicole a ton of cash)
2. E. Pierce Marshall died on June 20, 2006 (died while fighting to keep the cash away from Anna Nicole)
3. Daniel Smith died on September 10, 2006 (died when visiting Anna Nicole, her baby, and a potential baby daddy)
4. Anna Nicole Smith died on February 8, 2007 (died shortly after being named in the lawsuit against Trimspa)

Or maybe there is no conspiracy and the Trimspa killed her.

The Hoohaa Monologues

A theater in Florida changed its marquee because they are showing "The Vagina Monologues" and a driver got offended by the word VAGINA. Apparently her daughter asked what a VAGINA is and she was offended that she even had to discuss this with her daughter. Of course, the "news" story was even more entertaining because the reporter couldn't even use the word VAGINA. He kept saying "that certain female anatomy." Good Grief! VAGINA! VAGINA! VAGINA! Why are people so offended and confused by this word (VAGINA)?

Guess what? That lady that was offended by the sign has a VAGINA. Her daughter that doesn't know what a VAGINA is, has a VAGINA. Using the word VAGINA is just about as offensive as talking about your femur bone. Get a damned dictionary and figure it out. Don't worry Merriam-Webster will tell you if it is an offensive or vulgar word (they do if you look up words like cunt). VAGINA does not have this disclaimer. See:

va·gi·na (or as I would say VA-GI-NA)
Pronunciation: v&-'jI-n&
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural va·gi·nae /-(")nE /; or -nas
Etymology: Latin, literally, sheath
1 : a canal in a female mammal that leads from the uterus to the external orifice of the genital canal
2 : a canal that is similar in function or location to the vagina and occurs in various animals other than mammals

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Some stupid things and people I saw today

I'm tired of the stories about the astronaut that got arrested. She allegedly committed a criminal act and obviously she needs medical attention. This is a story about bad judgment and probably serious mental illness. Instead the media is creating all sorts of extra drama and sensationalizing the story. Here is a sample of the stupid crap I have been subjected to:

1. An idiot psychologist say, "this didn't come from a sad place, it came from a mad place." What school did you flunk out of? If I went to therapy and he/she/it said something like that I would tell that therapist to fuck off.

2. A headline that read "Astronaut suffered 'mental anguish'" No kidding.

3. Listening to Jay Leno (I was at the laundry mat so I had no choice) making jokes about the police having to frisk someone wearing a diaper. Asshole.

4. Some show on Headline News picking out who should play these people in the TV movie. Just in case you were wondering Holly Hunter should be cast as Lisa Nowak; Bill Paxton as William Oefelein, and Anne Heche as Colleen Shipman. This woman has serious problems and the media is trying to book Holly Hunter's next acting gig?

I'm glad the media is taking such a sensitive approach to this story. And I'm sure her kids appreciate it too.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Perry requires the HPV vaccine

By executive order, all girls in Texas will be required to get the HPV vaccine then they are in the 6th grade. Personally I think that all girls should get this vaccine. Cervical cancer is bad. I do question his motives. There were already bills making it through both houses. So where is the emergency? Well, Merck might have been getting nervous because similar bills have failed in other states. I mean, consider the profits. When a series of the vaccine costs about $360, wouldn't you want it to be a requirement to give the vaccine to about 200,000 girls a year? In case you were wondering that would be $72 million dollars. It is also a little bit fishy that Perry's former chief of staff is now a lobbyist for Merck and his current chief of staff's mother is a state representative that gets funding from Women In Government (they received money from Merck).

So what I wonder now that we have a good thing for all the wrong reasons is who pays for the vaccine? The millions of uninsured Texans? Those lucky enough to have health insurance that probably won't cover the costs of the vaccine? The governor's executive order seems to be silent on that point.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Keep it weird, Gladys, keep it weird

UPDATE: I thought Gladys was so funny that I thought it might be Joe Sears of "Greater Tuna" fame. According to The Austinist, this was prank done by the KLBJ morning show. Even thought I think they have a crappy morning show, I still think its funny. I love Gladys.

I've decided I just don't care

I hate those stupid verification things. I can't ever get it right. I am not fluent in wiggly. Because I hate those things so much, I am turning mine off. Spammers: comment away! I do reserve the right to turn it back on. One day I may become a worldwide sensation and then the spammers will come here in droves. But until that time comes...