Monday, July 09, 2007

Today's Asshat is John Mayer

I am an angry pineapple today and I think that John Mayer owes me an apology. Actually, there are a lot of things that John Mayer should apologize for. First, he should apologize for subjecting the world to his crappy music. The world does not need any more whiny songs. Second, he should apologize for using Jessica Simpson as a beard. It is an embarassment to her (and I don't even like her) and I'm still convinced that spineless turd does not have a penis. He can date as many women with fake boobs as he wants, and it will never convince me that he is a man. But the thing he really should apologize for is the "apology" video he posted on his website.




Dog fighting is a felony. It is animal abuse and is not a joke. As far as I am concerned it is just as crappy as child abuse and no one would tolerate jokes about that.

The fact is that American Pit Bulls are not an aggressive breed by nature. The American Temerament Test Society has tested American Pit Bulls and as a breed got a grade of 84.1%. Golden Retrievers got a grade of 83.8%. The average overall pass rate for all breeds is 81.5%. It would appear that Pit Bulls have a better temperament than a lot of other dogs. But any dog can become a dangerous dog. Especially when they are abused, starved and taunted. I don't have the stomach to post pictures of the tools they use to train dogs to fight, but it makes medieval torture devices look pretty tame in comparison. Not very funny, is it?

If you want to tell him what a bastard loser he is for his video (or you just want to tell him his music sucks) you can send him a message on his myspace page: http://www.myspace.com/johnmayer. Or call his representation. He is represented by Headline Entertainment. Here is the number 888.552.6737.


16 comments:

mad said...

What the heck was that all about?

pineapple said...

I think it is called bad judgment... but he is still an ass and his music sucks.

mad said...

Did he do a dog or something? I'd look it up, but I guess I'm not that motivated.

pineapple said...

He was making a terrible joke about Michael Vick and his dog fighting investigation. Unfortunately, his joke was as good as his music...

IronPirate said...

So by that you must mean awesome. Right? Or are you think of a different John Mayer. It was a joke, if you want to get mad at someone, go bitch about Michael Vick who ACTUALLY dog fights.

pineapple said...

IronPirate: Some jokes are never funny. That is one of them. John Mayer is an asshat. Michael Vick is a piece of shit too.

Anonymous said...

I wish I was as cool as pineapple... damn

pineapple said...

Anonymous: you seem pretty damn cool to me.

Whose Reality said...

fuck yall hes a brilliant guitarist... his music doesnt suck.. hes a prodigy who writes some gay lyrics at times.. but can shit on all of your favorite guitarists

pineapple said...

whose reality: actually, his music does suck and his guitar skills are not "brilliant" and he is not a "prodigy". But yes, his lyrics are "gay". And he sucks just as much as his music does. thanks for stopping by and sharing your profound opinion with us!

Anonymous said...

being a classically trained musician, i must say that it's out of place to bash mayer's musical abilities. he is a very apt guitarist. i agree that he shouldn't be dabbling in comedy; the video is pretty lame. all he's guilty of is poor humor.

pineapple said...

anonymous: thanks for stopping by. you are right that he should stay away from the comedy thing. you may have been "classically trained", but his music is still crappy.

Anonymous said...

If his music is so crappy, then why would be be playing with greats like B.B. King or Eric Clapton? Obviously he must have some talent if greats like those listed above would actually play songs with him...maybe you should go back and think again about those comments because you obviously didn't think the first time...and so what if he made a joke that wasn't that funny? All he's doing is poking fun at Mike Vick who screwed up his life...so get over his awful comedy and grow up a little

pineapple said...

anonymous: i still think his music is crap. i still think the joke was awful. but maybe you are the one who should "grow up" because I am entitled to my opinion and I am free to hate his stupid, whiny, bullshit music all I want to.

Anonymous said...

I guess you feel important now. in this free country where your
intitled to your opinion. how cute. quit wining yourself asshole

pineapple said...

Anonymous: Thanks for joining in the dialogue two years after the fact! I'm guessing you are the one feeling important by using big words like "intitled" and "wining" and by calling me an "asshole". Good for you!