So What Kills A Campaign?

Race baiting. Lies. Nasty campaigning. Basically all of the things the McCain campaign did. Even Fox News has declared John McCain a lost cause. What is amazing is that it isn't anything that he did. It wasn't his lies about Barack Obama, it wasn't his misguided notion that people are "fundamentals", it wasn't the GOP spending over $150,000 to dress Sarah Palin as a "hockey mom", and it wasn't any of his scandals finally biting him in the ass. It wasn't any of the things we had expected. It was a misguided, nut job named Ashley Todd that carved a backwards "B" on her face that did him in. Maybe next time she won't use a mirror when she carves initials on to her face? But seriously, the Mayor and his buddies at Fox news have been pooh-poohing the lousy poll numbers and citing some dubious polls to make things seem winnable for the Mayor.

But now, John Moody, executive vice president at Fox News, commented on his blog that "this incident could become a watershed event in the 11 days before the election. If Ms. Todd's allegations are proven accurate, some voters may revisit their support for Senator Obama, not because they are racists (with due respect to Rep. John Murtha), but because they suddenly feel they do not know enough about the Democratic nominee. If the incident turns out to be a hoax, Senator McCain's quest for the presidency is over, forever linked to race-baiting."

It seems that no matter what the outcome, it will always be linked to Barack Obama's race. For me, it is inspiring that for the first time ever there will not be some old white dude running things. But his race is irrelevant to me. However, Fox news and other conservatives cannot come to grips with the fact that Americans are fed up and see Obama as the better candidate. For them, it has to boil down to race (or race baiting as the case may be).

tags: John McCain Barack Obama Ashley Todd Fox News Sarah Palin Election Race Race-Baiting John Moody

This Is So Wrong, Yet So Right

Listen to Henry "Wally" Stopher (a/k/a "Oat Willy") sing about why you should vote Obama.

The Mavericky Pineapple from Texas

I'm feeling mavericky today. I could just wander around aimlessly today and not lift up my arms like my mavericky friend, Bobum.* But I'm a different kind of mavericky maverick. I'm the kind of maverick that stands up against the majority of voters in Texas by voting Democratic. And I'm going to do it today. That's right. Today. I get to vote for Barack Obama today and it feels really damn good. I get to reject the last eight years of failed republican policy today. I also get to vote for some great people running for statewide office that probably don't have a snowball's chance in hell of winning. But that's what it is like when you are mavericky. You vote against the John McCains and the John Cornyns of the world even though you know it is a losing proposition in Texas. But you do it because it is the right thing to do. That, and you get a really cool "I Voted" sticker.



*He will be mavericky in the voting way, too. Just maybe not today.

Joe Sixpack vs. Joe the Plumber

There's been a lot of talk about "Joe". First there was all this "Joe Sixpack" business. I mean is that much better than being "John Q. Public" or "John Doe"? Because that is what they (as in the Republican Fuck Squad) are talking about when they use this term. Joe Sixpack is a term that means all apathetic Americans that don't really factor into their politics at all. They should just be honest and say and "all the Americans that I don't give a shit about because you don't give a shit about me" instead of Joe Sixpack. Of course, honesty is not the strong suit for Mayor McCheese or for Caribou Barbie.

But "Joe the Plumber" is all the rage today. So who is this dude? Well, his real name is Joe Wurzelbacher from Ohio. But this is who he really is: a jackass that doesn't have a plumber's license and has no real plan to buy a business (and that business does not make more than $250,000 a year). Just in case you are wondering, in Ohio you have to have a license to operate as a plumber. I looked it up. And now that everyone knows that he and his employer are operating without a license, he may not have to worry about paying taxes at all when he is out of a job. Also, kudos to the fact checkers working for the Mayor! As always, you do a stellar job. Keep up the good work.

So as Mayor McCheese made his case for "Joe the Plumber" over 20 times last night, he was really going to bat for someone just as foolish, dishonest and irresponsible as himself. That's just neat! In the end, I'd rather hang with Joe Sixpack because he's honest about who he is and, most importantly, he's got a six pack.

tags: Joe Sixpack Six Pack Joe Plumber Wurzelbacher Ohio John McCain Sarah Palin Barack Obama President Debate

WWMD?

So what would a maverick do? Something "mavericky", of course!

If you live in a market where your local NBC affiliate couldn't work it out with Time Warner, you weren't able to watch the VP debate on Saturday Night Live. I have that problem and frankly, it is too much trouble to unhook the cable and attach an antenna to watch a few shows on NBC, so I've opted for viewing them online. Therefore, I have been a lazy blogger and posted a blog that is basically just a video without any useful or witting commentary. So, for those of you not watching that important football game because you got screwed over, enjoy something you could have been watching last night.

tags: VP Vice President Debate Tina Fey Saturday Night Live SNL NBC Time Warner

The Word of Today is "Guilty"

As in O.J. Simpson was found guilty on all 12 counts stemming from a confrontation in a hotel room last year, including armed robbery and kidnapping. He went into the trial acting all cocky like he can break any law in the world without getting in trouble. Guess he isn't feeling so cocky today, huh? Ironically, his guilty verdict came in 13 years to the day he got away with murder. Karma is an ironic bitch, isn't it?

tags: O.J. Simpson trial guilty armed robbery kidnapping

No Bingo For Pineapple

First of all, the debate was a disappointment because I didn't win at Palin Bingo. So that totally sucked. Of course, the downside of playing Palin Bingo is that you have to carefully listen to every single, grating word the Runner-Up had said. This is why I feel like I am an expert on the Vice Presidential Debate. Because I didn't spend very much time taunting and making fun. I mostly listened. While I was impressed with the Runner-Up's ability to actually complete coherent thoughts about issues, I was more amazed that she managed to only directly answer two questions all night. For example, when asked about Pakistan she completely failed to mention that country in her answer. I know this because "Pakistan" was on my bingo card. So basically she had some prepared answers and she gave then no matter what the question was. And then she would wink or say "you know". I can't believe Biden only called her out one time for not answering the question. I guess he doesn't like to repeat himself that many times.

But the most appalling thing was that Biden had to give The Runner-Up a civics lesson. Which goes to show, that they have not fully prepped her about what a Vice President really does and what their Constitutional duties are. Or, she asked Dick Cheney. From her answer last night, that appears to be the case. There were two lawyers in the room watching and we were both stunned into silenced by her answer about how she wants to expand the powers of the Vice President in its flexible role of being part of the Executive Branch (convenient when you want to avoid subpoenas) and being part of the Legislative Branch (convenient when you want to make unconstitutional laws). Maybe she can out-Cheney Cheney by figuring out how the Vice President is also part of the Judicial Branch? Just fuck the Constitution to hell, why don't ya?

tags: Palin Bingo Vice President Debate Joe Biden